“Injecting humor into your conversations can be a delightful way to brighten someone’s day, especially when it comes to texting that special lady in your life. In this article, we’ve curated a collection of witty and funny text messages guaranteed to evoke laughter and bring a smile to her face. Whether you’re looking to share a clever joke, a playful pun, or a hilarious observation, these messages are sure to spark joy and leave her eagerly awaiting your next witty exchange.”
Table of Contents
Funny text messages for wife
1 “Honey, I just realized I forgot to give you your ‘Wife of the Year’ award…again. My bad!”
2 “I asked Google how to deal with a stubborn wife. It just showed me pictures of you.”
3 “Do you ever get tired of being so perfect? Asking for a friend.”
4 “If being awesome was a crime, you’d have a life sentence!”
5 “I’m pretty sure ‘happily ever after’ was written about us. Or maybe I just dreamt it after eating too much pizza.”
SEE MORE:50+ Smart, Funny Good Will Hunting Quotes
6 “You’re like a dictionary, you add meaning to my life… and occasionally, you correct my spelling.”
7 “Roses are red, violets are blue, I’m terrible at rhymes, can I have dinner with you?”
8 “You’re the only person I’d share my snacks with… well, maybe not my last slice of pizza.”
9 “I love you more than coffee, and that’s saying a latte.”
10 “If loving you is wrong, then I don’t want to be right… because being wrong feels so right.”
11 “Do you have a map? I keep getting lost in your eyes… and also in the kitchen.”
12 “They say love is blind, but I think you just blinded me with your beauty.”
13 “I promise to love you even when you’re old and gray… but please don’t ask me to carry you up the stairs.”
14 “I’m not saying you’re crazy, but if you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber.”
15 “If laughter is the best medicine, then you’re my daily dose of vitamins.”
16 “You’re my favorite notification… even when you’re reminding me to take out the trash.”
17 “I would walk through fire for you… well, not fire, because that’s dangerous. But a super humid room… but not too humid because my hair…”
18 “If kisses were snowflakes, I’d send you a blizzard.”
19 “You’re the cheese to my macaroni, the peanut butter to my jelly, and the reason my socks never match.”
20 “They say behind every great man is a great woman. Well, looks like you’re stuck with me, because greatness runs in our family!”
Funny text messages to send a girl on Instagram
21 “Hey, do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?”
22 “Are you a magician? Because whenever I look at your Instagram, everyone else disappears.”
23 “Do you have a name, or can I call you mine?”
24 “Do you have a map? I keep getting lost in your posts.”
25 “If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber!”
26 “Are you made of copper and tellurium? Because you’re Cu-Te.”
27 “Do you believe in love at first scroll, or should I double-tap again?”
28 “Are you a bank loan? Because you have my interest.”
29 “I must be a snowflake because I’ve fallen for your feed.”
30 “If you were a fruit, you’d be a fineapple!”
31 “Is your name Google? Because you’ve got everything I’ve been searching for.”
32 “Do you have a Band-Aid? Because I just scraped my knee falling for you… your posts.”
33 “Excuse me, but I think you dropped something: my jaw.”
34 “Are you Wi-Fi? Because I’m feeling a connection.”
35 “Do you have a sunburn, or are you always this hot in your photos?”
36 “Do you have a name, or can I call you ‘Mine’?”
37 “Do you have a pencil? Because I want to erase your past and write our future.”
38 “I’m not a photographer, but I can definitely picture us together.”
39 “Is it hot in here, or is it just your latest selfie?”
40 “Do you believe in love at first profile pic, or should I swipe through again?”
Jokes to make a girl laugh over text
41 “Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!”
42 “What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!”
43 “Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts!”
44 “Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!”
45 “What did one wall say to the other wall? I’ll meet you at the corner!”
46 “Why don’t eggs tell jokes? Because they might crack up!”
47 “What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta!”
48 “Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired!”
49 “Can you move out of your house and live in my heart? Rent is free.”
50 “It seems you are hot enough to melt the ice of my heart.”
51 “Your father must be a mobster because you are the bomb.”
52 “Have you ever been to Alaska? Oh, me neither. We are so much alike!”
53 “I look at your photo and think: ‘It seems like my girlfriend is a new Miss Universe.’”
54 “If animals could talk, which would be the rudest?”
55 “What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever eaten for breakfast that is not breakfast food?”
56 “If you were a vegetable, what would you be and why?”
57 “Is cereal soup? Why or why not?”
58 “If you were arrested with no explanation, what would your friends and family assume you had done?”
59 “Do you like Mexican food? Cause I want to wrap you in my arms and make you my BAE-RITTO.”
60 “Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!”
Funny words to make her fall in love
61 “You’re my favorite notification.”
62 “If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber.”
63 “I love you more than pizza…and I really, really love pizza.”
64 “Do you have a sunburn, or are you always this hot?”
65 “Are you a campfire? Because you’re hot and I want s’more.”
66 “I’m not a photographer, but I still picture you and me together…in bed.”
67 “Without you, I am like a nerd without braces, shoes without laces, and a sentence without spaces.”
68 “We go together like Nutella and a spoon. And I’m definitely the Nutella.”
69 “If you kiss me, I’m not responsible for what happens next.”
70 “I felt a little off today, but you turned me on.”
71 “I can’t decide what I want more, food or you? Maybe food on you!”
72 “You’re hotter than the bottom of my laptop after binge-watching Netflix.”
73 “I wanted to send you something that would make you smile, but the mailman told me to get it out of the mailbox.”
74 “You’re my dream girl. Spending time with you is like finding a rare Pokémon.”
75 “If you were a fruit, you’d be a fine-apple.”
76 “I must be a snowflake because I’ve fallen for you.”
77 “You’re the WiFi to my heart. I feel a strong connection.”
78 “Do you have a name, or can I call you mine?”
79 “I’m not a genie, but I can make your dreams come true.”
80 “If beauty were time, you’d be an eternity.”
Make her laugh text messages, puns, and wordplay
81 I tried to sue the airport for misplacing my luggage. I lost my case.
82 What does the ghost call his true love? My ghoul-friend.
83 When God made you, he must have been showing off.
84 Why did the chicken go to the séance? To get to the other side
85 Why did the orange stop? It ran out of juice!
86 Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert? Because she was stuffed
87 Why do melons have weddings? Because they cantaloupe.
88 Why shouldn’t you fall in love with a pastry chef? He’ll eventually dessert you!
89 What did 0 say to 8? Nice belt!
90 What did one man say to the other while eating a clownfish? Well, this tastes a bit funny.
91 What did the left eye say to the right eye? Between us, something smells!
92 They say nothing lasts forever. So, will you be my nothing?
93 What did the little boat say to the yacht? Can I interest you in a little row-mance?
94 What did the man with the broken leg say to his nurse? “I’ve got a crutch on you.”
95 What do runners eat before a race? Nothing, they fast!
96 What do you call a factory that only markets passable products? A satisfactory!
97 What do you call a pony with a cough? A little hoarse.
98 What do you call someone with a rubber toe? Roberto.
99 What do you call two birds in love? Tweet-hearts!
100 Why are volcanos so nice? They lava you.
Short funny jokes to make a girl laugh through text
101 “Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!”
102 “What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!”
103 “Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts!”
104 “Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!”
105 “What did one wall say to the other wall? I’ll meet you at the corner!”
106 “Why don’t eggs tell jokes? Because they might crack up!”
107 “What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta!”
108 “Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired!”
109 “Can you move out of your house and live in my heart? Rent is free.”
110 “It seems you are hot enough to melt the ice of my heart.”
111 “Your father must be a mobster because you are the bomb.”
112 “Have you ever been to Alaska? Oh, me neither. We are so much alike!”
113 “I look at your photo and think: ‘It seems like my girlfriend is a new Miss Universe.’”
114 “If animals could talk, which would be the rudest?”
115 “What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever eaten for breakfast that is not breakfast food?”
116 “If you were a vegetable, what would you be and why?”
117 “Is cereal soup? Why or why not?”
118 “If you were arrested with no explanation, what would your friends and family assume you had done?”
119 “Do you like Mexican food? Cause I want to wrap you in my arms and make you my BAE-RITTO.”
120 “Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!”
Conclusion:
In conclusion, laughter truly is the best medicine, and sharing a good joke or witty remark can brighten anyone’s day. Whether it’s through text messages or in person, humor has the power to strengthen bonds and create memorable moments. So, keep spreading those smiles and laughs—it’s a language everyone understands!